Just got a message about this band called Shturm. I cannot begin to compare this to anything I’ve ever heard, but it’s good. Boy is it GOOD!

Shturm is a group of four guys from Krasnodar, Russia, a city located in the South-Western corner of the country. Taking a quick look through the band’s profile page on Encyclopaedia Metallum, my guess is the band started out in 2003, doing a brutal sort of Black Metal. Their first record came out in 2004 and carries the title unambiguous title Fresh Christian Meat.

Stepping forward in time to the current year, the band released its third album, called Karmaruna. I don’t proclaim to have heard anything more of that than the one song for which they released a video, but that does seem to suggest the band have drastically developed their style since 2004. I’ve lined up the video past the jump.

Hot shit alarm, people! I received a promo pack for a highly lovable group of Portuguese Metallers. They are called The Firstborn and play a style that is as familiar and comfortable as it is refreshing and exhilarating.

The Firstborn are from a place called Amora in Portugal and have been making music together since 1999. They are five guys in the most classic line-up possible and have so far churned out exactly five full-length studio albums. Nothing more, nothing less. Their latest effort, following up on 2008’s The Noble Search, is called Lions Among Men and they aired it just over a month ago.

Just a quick one by suggestion of motig, the guy who seems to dump links on our plate for a living. His suggestion this time was to check out a US Thrash Metal outfit named Vektor and even though we’ve been treating them before, there’s no harm in checking them out again. The band holds house in a town called Tempe, Arizona. From what I’ve seen / heard / read, Arizona is a pretty hot place and that has rubbed off on these chaps’ music: it’s hot as shit!

If I had to describe their music in one sentence, I’d say it’s the result of kinky inbred sex of the kids that themselves sprung from all four of the Big Four of Thrash having an orgy with four of the classic Norwegian Black Metal outfits. This stuff is fuckin’ deranged!

I would swear on my scrotum that I’ve heard this band before, just have no idea where and when. The track I’ve embedded only seems to be online since mid-June and either my short-term memory is leaving me or this just looks a lot like something else I’ve heard a longer time ago. It’s probably the former, combined with the scientifically proven fact that I’m an idiot.

But that’s not what I want to discuss today. Or ever. Instead, let’s talk about Brymir, yeah? They play a de-li-cious form of Pagan / Folk Metal, dark as an armpit inside a sweaty sweater, yet melodic as a motherfucker, like a mix of Ensiferum and Insomnium – thanks to motig for making that comparison and for recommending the band in fact. As inevitable as death, and you’ve probably already guessed it, these guys are Finnish.

The big moment! The top four of albums I’ve reviewed this year. If you’ve missed what came before this, these four were preceded by eleven other albums in Part 1 and Part 2 of this list. Today’s four are the absolute cream of the crop.

As you’ll read on, there’s one thing you might notice: Finland’s the winner. Each and every single band in this top 4 hails out of the most Metal nation on the planet. Something I only just discovered myself. I think the Finnish are to Metal what American are to hamburgers. What Germans are to cars. And what Dutchmen are to drugs and prostitutes.

Anyfuck, I can make this a long and boring speech up front, like they do with most award shows, but I think everyone would just prefer to fuckin’ get going with this! After all, it’s Christmas Eve tonight and I’m sure you’ll want to get back to spinning Metal albums sitting under the Christmas tree.

Yes! Part 2 of the most important list in the whole wide world of Metal. The list of best albums I have reviewed all year. You can’t possibly get a more complete overview of what happened in the Metallic world, anywhere.

Seriously though, this is just a list. My own little list of fifteen albums that struck a special chord with me this year. But then again, I do hear a fuckload of Metal over the course of a year and the fact that these fifteen stood out as the top albums does make them a little special, don’t you think? Hence they are albums that I highly recommend you to listen to, and buy when you can get your grubby hands on them and have no more fuckin’ debts to pay off.

Thanks to CroOZza’s comment here, I now know something I should’ve known months ago: that Black Sun Aeon has released a new album! One of many projects by Finland’s most busy Metal wonderboy Tuomas Saukkonen, this outfit traditionally represents the darkest of his projects.

Also traditionally, this project was one he manned 100% alone. Until now. I’m reading that for this new album, entitled Blacklight Deliverance, Tuomas is joined by two additional vocalists: Mikko Heikkilä (male cleans) and Janica Lönn (female cleans), bringing the total number of voices including Tuomas’ to three. Still at the old is the fact that Saukkonen’s responsible for all instruments by himself.

For the fans of dark black Viking Folky type of Metal, otherwise known as Vikingy Black Metal or Folky Dark Metal, we’ve got Slartibartfass. “What? Slarty bass fart?” Yeah, something like that. It’s Slartibartfass, which is German for Slartibartfast, which is a character in The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy book series. I didn’t know that, so I’ll just continue to read the dirty version.

Anyfuck, going back to the band from the German city of Ulm, they’ve got a new record out. Their fourth since forming in 2004 and it’s called Schwarz Verhüllt, a German title, just like their three earlier works. It means ‘Black Covers Up’ or ‘Black Veils’ or something of that notion. Loosely said it’s probably meant as ‘Black Disguises’ or something. The album was released on October 26^th and the promo pack has been sitting on my desktop for weeks.

Closing in on year end, most sites, mags and blogs have started publishing their year-end lists. The Top 10’s of Best Albums of 2011 will rain down on you like a volley of arrows. And with a bit of luck also The Baboon will publish some kind of list. But fuck me sideways, are we glad that we waited a bit with publishing our list! Aspherium comes straight out of fuckin’ nowhere with it’s The Veil of Serenity album.

The band hails from the Norwegian town of Moss, not too far from Oslo. Them being Norwegian I was expecting some ass-ripping Black Metal, with enough blackness to make a black hole feel ashamed and enough evil to make Satan look like a schoolgirl with colorful braids. To some of our regular or irregular writers that would be very preferable per se, but not to me. Darkness doesn’t get it up for me and neither do tremolo picking and poor production.

Not that I couldn’t get it up on any song or band employing these ingredients, it’s just that it’d have to be combined with at least two of the following elements; groove, melody and intelligent songwriting. With Aspherium I find all of this. And more.

Returning with their second offering after a hiatus, and 8^th in total, Greek Atmospheric Death Metal band Septicflesh have taken a reversed songwriting approach in The Great Mass, and formed the classical foundations before applying the bludgeoning Metal. What results is a neurotic mix of the two which some may consider watered down, and others an innovative approach that certainly beats other recent attempts.

To get an idea of the insanity within this album, take We, The Gods and Lovecraft’s Death from Communion and multiply. The opening track, The Vampire From Nazareth, is a perfect example of this, akin to a symphonic Behemoth that combines an ethereal female vocal and Anton’s own harsh grunt, which has now morphed into a Nergal tribute, while Benardo overpowers most other instruments with his blistering drum patterns.